Cooper's Technique

What we tell the Children


KNOCK, KNOCK…!
Who’s there?!
Thieve.
Thieve who—

And next thing you know, you find your son dead on the floor or something. Not dead, but freaked out. The thieve has entered the house, anyway, and now, walking slowly through the living room, you do a mental list of all the books you’ll have to buy, to replace your long hours of T.V. watching. In the kitchen, the microwave is gone too. And you thought you’d never actually need all the recipes grandma had given you a long time ago.

Knock, Knock…in the joke, there’s supposed to be oranges, and shampoos, and cows at your door, but in the real life, other than the obnoxious neighbourhood, or the eager mailman, who would knock on the door? How can a joke be made when these kinds of people knock, knock on your door? Are you willing to open the door?

A thieve knocked on the door this time. It was about time, though, for us to realize what is it that the daily knock, knock thing was telling our children to open the door, even though we weren’t supposed to.

Kids open the door, because their parents were careless enough as to not buy one of those see-through glasses that are perforated on doors. And this product does sound like a thing only Info-mericals would shoe, but the ridiculous glass, it would’ve saved children’s lives—or well-being. Then again, the small ones, they open the door because they don’t reach the glass. They are too anxious to glance by the window, because they only want to open the door and laugh out loud at the giant cookie, or something.

Others, sadly, open the door because they believe the black outfit the “knocker” is wearing is so totally cool and Star Wars-like. They probably think he’s there to give them costumes, or something.

Children are optimistic, and that is bad. It is time for our children to be save, and so they must know the truth. Tell them the truth about the jokes, about the one behind the door, out there. It’s not happy. If one day grandma comes and visits, and she gets mad at you because your son didn’t want to open the door, think about it, it is better to have hysterics mothers-in-law than strangers coming in the house, and taking the T.V. along with the microwave.

We should be grateful, though, because everyone knocks. I mean, the strangers could bang the door and come in, or something. And that’s the whole point of the knock, knock. To realize there is some decency within thieves and criminals.

Perhaps these jokes were developed by the criminals themselves. They wanted to indirectly educate the children to open the door, no matter the person or thing outside whatsoever. If kids thought about it this way, then it would be much easier for a thieve to come in the house, and steal things.

Knock, Knock…!
Who’s there?!
Cow.
I’m not opening the door.